The other day my daughter asked me how Valentine’s Day started. She’s in Grade 5 so starting to worry a little bit about the message she sends when she hands the boys (and the girls) in her class a Hannah Montana valentine which says something about making cool music together.  So I explained that traditionally Valentine’s Day had been a day when male secret admirers gave their female crushes a card, rose, or small gift, and signed an anonymous note declaring their devotion and love.  Eventually it became a greeting card company gold mine with everyone from boyfriends and girlfriends, husbands and wives, grandparents and grandchildren, students and teacher and kids-to-kids getting in on the action.  It’s not an understatement to say as a result, it’s become a little less significant. Particularly once you get 32 of them, all addressed to “Classmate”. (And seriously, which one of you Moms started attaching nut-free chocolates and pink pencils to the cards – enough already!) 

But it did start me thinking that while I do love my family, and my friends, and even the occasional sales clerk who convinces me I look good in those pants, that there are some inanimate objects I would like to issue Valentines to instead, this year.

• My crock pot. Seriously. Who else cooks dinner for me while I work, run kids to hockey and spend 10 or 60 minutes on Twitter?
• The inventors of pre-cooked bacon, bagged salad and frozen garlic bread.  And the “flash-freeze” process. 
• The clothing manufacturers who decided that a size 10 is all-of-a-sudden a size 4. Well will you look at that! I guess I can have that cheese plate after all.
• My beloved BlackBerry, Seamus. He’s the only one of my children who knows when to stop making so much noise (okay I can turn him off, granted), gives me information I can use (versus “I haven’t changed my underwear in three days”), and never drinks all my diet Pepsi, steals my chocolate or refuses to put his boots/protective covering on.
• The mirrors they seem to have in fitting rooms and hotels. I know you deploy the “skinny” mirror but it still counts.  I carry that image in my head all day, even if others don’t.  So there.

So this Valentine’s Day, do the right thing – help your child with their cards – it’s worth the price of social acceptance, but think about sending an anonymous one too  - maybe to that fabulous new shoe that looks great and doesn’t hurt to wear. No taped-on chocolate required.

Kathy Buckworth’s latest book “Shut Up & Eat: Tales of Chicken, Children & Chardonnay” is now available for pre-order on amazon.ca and at Chapters Online. Look for the book in bookstores on March 21^st. Visit www.kathybuckworth.com and follow Kathy on Twitter.