This post first appeared in The Women's Coaching Company blog. Reprinted by permission.

I hear that a lot around this time of year, 'What will this year bring?' and it frustrates me really. The answer surely is, 'Whatever you decide it will bring'. It frustrates me because it gives you absolutely no sense of control over what will happen to you. It's like you're assuming, you'll have no choice, things will just happen to you, decisions will be made around you, things will move on – without your influence.

Of course, that's not what happens. In actual fact, you're entirely and completely in control. You decide what job you do, what friends you have, what experiences you have, what you learn and if you don't believe me and think that 'luck' opened up an opportunity, or 'being in the right place at the right time', held a door open for you, then think again. Ask yourself, how did I end up talking to that person or being in that room or travelling to that place? The answer will always be, because at some point down that line of events, you made a decision to do something, speak to someone, tell someone something.

I had this conversation a few weeks ago over lunch with a woman in business I admire hugely. This time last year, she was worried about where her business was going, she was worried about cash flow and staffing. Now, at the end of the year, she's in a much healthier place, her staffing issues are sorted, her cash flow is well...flowing...and she was very relaxed about being out of the office and sat in a restaurant with me. She tried to tell me that she'd had a lot of luck this year. 'Rubbish!' I told her. 'You did it all!'. No...she maintained....she'd had a few key clients arrive at the door, a few opportunities had opened up and she'd simply moved at the right time. 'Still rubbish!', I laughed!.

She thought about it for a bit and a smile crept across her face. Her biggest client this year, she had quite assumed she'd met by accident. She'd be invited to an evening event at the last minute. Her initial reaction was to say no, it meant getting ready and going out at short notice instead of going home and putting her feet up. But as she smiled, she said, 'Actually something made me stop and accept'. She sat next to him at dinner, they laughed and got along well all evening and it wasn't until the very end of the evening when he introduced himself formally and told her what he did for a living. After a very brief exchange of business cards, he contacted her afterwards and hired her company. A very big contract was signed, a contract that would make a huge difference in 2011. She made the decision to go that evening, she decided to say yes, not having the first clue who she would meet. She had been in control.

That's my point. You're in control even when you think you're not. It's the little, every day things you say yes to, small decisions you make, the people you decide to call, the information you decide to divulge...those insignificant things turn into opportunities, fortuitous meetings, being seen, being heard.

So...my question for you is not 'What will this year bring?' but 'How will you sculpt your life in 2012?'. What will you decide? Where will you decide to go? Who will you decide to speak to? What new friendships or business partnerships will be made? What opportunities will you see and decide to go for? It's all up to you.

As for The Women's Coaching Company, you'll see a change in web site soon, a focus in direction as we continue to concentrate on our core business and passion, which as you know is supporting women to rise to board level. We'll take on new clients, we'll work with companies we haven't heard of yet and form friendships with professionals we haven't yet been introduced to.

The UK Coaching Partnership will see it's latest Coaching Diploma for professionals course being run in January and another later in the year plus my fourth book, 'How to Coach a Woman', co-written with one of my business partners Meg Reid, will be launched in March. From experience, I know the book will be read by people who've never heard of me, it'll teach people what they want to know and give them a whole new perspective on working with, managing and coaching women.

As for me personally, some of you know that this year have seen some dramatic changes in my life...all initiated by the small decisions I made each step of the way. I've divorced, fallen in love with a wonderful man, acquired an amazing step daughter, moved offices and house 3 times finally settling in a beautiful village in Suffolk and I have many very important friends and family members I didn't even know existed this time last year! Plus, as if that wasn't enough, in May 2012, I'll become a mum for the very first time as I give birth to a daughter, Olivia-Drew, who incidentally must know I'm talking about her and she's decided to have a kick around right now!