It was grossly insensitive and disrespectful of me, but many times I have discounted the wisdom of the Dalai Lama because he wears glasses. I just figured, if he's a spiritually enlightened being, why would he have any health problems at all? In a similar way, I've also wondered why Oprah Winfrey can't get a handle on her weight. For a successful woman who seems to have a lot of answers, isn't it puzzling that she can't wrestle that one to the ground?

The hypocrisy, of course, is that I require glasses myself, and like Oprah, have had on-going battles with my body image. So I think it's pretty clear who I am truly commenting on when I make those statements. (As we all know, the best way to grasp how harshly we judge ourselves is to pay attention to how we judge others.)

I mention these criticisms not because they are warranted, but because it occurred to me the other morning that maybe these 'flaws' that I am noticing in others, aren't actually flaws at all. Perhaps, they are crucial ingredients to someone's life path or spin-offs from an unusually bold choice or a wonderful character trait.

What if, for example, the Dalai Lama's need for glasses is not a statement about his physical well-being as much as it is a function of his great compassion? Maybe he can't bear to 'see' the suffering of his people and because he is that sensitive and loving, he makes a great spiritual leader.

Maybe the whole weight thing is the lynch pin in Oprah's success. Consider for a moment that extra weight represents a protection of sorts. Then think about how vulnerable and authentic Oprah manages to be on a world stage, a place from which one can be attacked regularly, sometimes viciously, by the press. Perhaps that protection is the very thing that allows her to stand before the world and courageously reveal her inner-self.

We could also look at it from another angle. I have long felt that public popularity is generally a function of being able to hook into the zeitgeist, the trends and themes of the time. Oprah's show rose to popularity just as the obesity epidemic was starting to take hold in North America. Her personal struggle with weight mirrored exactly what the population was facing en mass and it created a strong bond with her audience. Without the weight problem, Oprah would probably still be shining her light in the world, but perhaps with it she is able to reach far more people.

My point here is really not about Oprah or the Dalai Lama. It's about accepting all of ourselves, even our supposed shortcomings, and respecting that each part of us, difficult or not, contributes to the whole. To isolate and eliminate those aspects of our personality and life that we least enjoy is to discount the larger role that they play in our successes.

This is not to say that we shouldn't strive to improve, but it is to acknowledge that our desire for improvement might not even be present without the issues that vex us most. Problems can be poetic in their relation to our larger life, and the human struggle is often the most beautiful and meaningful part of living. I'm going to remember that the next time I feel like judging myself or another.

And speaking about judgements and acceptance, I hope that his Holiness the Dalai Lama can forgive me for my rash and egotistical judgements about his eye sight, and Oprah Winfrey for my thoughts about her weight. I'm confident they can, because I'm sure they are both wise enough to know that those remarks were never really about them anyway.